Early Senior Year Vibes

Senior year of undergrad is a whirlwind of emotions, let me tell ya…

On one hand, you are trying to enjoy your last year as a dumb college kid: partying until 4 am even though you have an 8 am the next morning, late night Jimmy John’s runs, waiting until the absolute last minute to study for your big exam, etc.

On the other hand, you are trying to prepare yourself for *cue horror music* adulthood: filling out applications, studying for placement exams, applying for jobs, training yourself to be a morning person, etc.

There is the friend thing…

You have the friends that you probably won’t see much after college so you’re stuck between (1) wanting to spend as much time with them as possible before you aren’t a 5 minute walk away from each other anymore, and (2) trying not to get too close so that the goodbye isn’t so hard.

You have the friends that you probably will see a lot after college and don’t know if they’re worth keeping around anymore because they are probably stunting your growth, but you love them too much to not keep them in your life forever.

And you have the friends that you want to make sure always stay in your life, but you’re worried that it might not work out in that way.

And the time thing…

This one is probably my biggest stressor right now. It’s like one minute you were living in the dorms, you blinked, and then all of the sudden you are registering to graduate this spring. You are both proud of everything you’ve accomplished, while still scared you didn’t do enough. You’re comparing yourself to some of your peers and thinking you did this whole college thing wrong because they have more to show for it than you do. But you keep forgetting to acknowledge the accomplishments you made that can’t be Snapchatted,  Instagrammed, Facebooked, or LinkedIn(ed?).

Look at everything you’ve learned so far: the people you’ve connected with and the people that you finally let go of, the people that inspired you and the people you’ve inspired. You have accomplished more than you’re giving yourself credit for.

Senior year is doing a good job testing my patience with all this balancing, but contrary to my own beliefs, I’m actually doing okay. I’m doing better than okay. I have friends who love me so much that my cup overflows, I have a family that is incredibly supportive of my plans and goals, and I have a God who is holding my hand every moment of every day through every worry. Every time senior year begins to weigh heavy on my shoulders, I just remind myself that I have an almighty God spotting me. I might lose my balance, but He will always be there to pick me back up. I might give up on myself, but He will always be there to hype me back up. And because of that I fear nothing.

Stay Fierce,
myrnabeyonce

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